Vulgar words in The Complete Memoirs of Jacques Casanova de Seingalt (Page 1)
This book at a glance
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The friend of popes and kings and noblemen, and of all the male and female ruffians and vagabonds of Europe, abbe, soldier, charlatan, gamester, financier, diplomatist, viveur, philosopher, virtuoso, "chemist, fiddler, and buffoon," each of these, and all of these was Giacomo Casanova, Chevalier de Seingalt, Knight of the Golden Spur.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 298 ~ ~ ~
I have felt in my very blood, ever since I was born, a most unconquerable hatred towards the whole tribe of fools, and it arises from the fact that I feel myself a blockhead whenever I am in their company.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 843 ~ ~ ~
"If it is the devil who has offended thee with his words," she said, "resent the insult with words likewise, jackass that thou art, but if I have offended thee myself, learn, stupid booby, that thou must respect me, and be off at once."
~ ~ ~ Sentence 1,515 ~ ~ ~
I would advise you to make love to my aunt, who is sixty years of age; M. Rosa will not be jealous, and you will become dear to everyone.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 1,868 ~ ~ ~
On my side I assumed a modest, and even sometimes a careless appearance, when, to shew his freedom from jealousy, he excited me to make love to his wife, who, on her part, understood but little how to perform the part of fancy free.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 1,875 ~ ~ ~
I praised her mind, but lamented over the shortcomings of her education; I said that the tone, the manners I adopted towards her, were those of good society, and proved the great esteem I entertained for her intelligence, but in the middle of all my fine speeches, towards the eleventh or twelfth day of my courtship, she suddenly put me out of all conceit by telling me that, being a priest, I ought to know that every amorous connection was a deadly sin, that God could see every action of His creatures, and that she would neither damn her soul nor place herself under the necessity of saying to her confessor that she had so far forgotten herself as to commit such a sin with a priest.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 1,984 ~ ~ ~
One day we had all three dined with him, and after dinner the senator left us, as was his wont, to enjoy his siesta; the little Gardela, having a dancing lesson to take, went away soon after him, and I found myself alone with Therese, whom I rather admired, although I had never made love to her.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 2,650 ~ ~ ~
After supper, I drew a most affecting picture of my position, shewing that I should be in need of everything until my arrival at Rome, where I was going, I said, to fill the post of secretary of memorials, and my astonishment may be imagined when I saw the blockhead delighted at the recital of my misfortunes.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 4,096 ~ ~ ~
This was the first time I had anything to do with a woman of quality, and that air of patronage, whatever kindness might accompany it, always put me out of temper, for I thought it made love out of the question.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 4,403 ~ ~ ~
I asked Bellino to sit on my bed with the intention of making love to him, and of treating him like a girl, but the two young sisters ran into my room and disturbed my plans.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 5,180 ~ ~ ~
He remarked, however, that I was not likely to be so well off on my return, because, in the country to which I was going, there was abundance of damaged goods, but that no one knew better than he did how to root out the venom left by the use of such bad merchandise.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 5,715 ~ ~ ~
I could very well understand that my colleague, Sanzonio, should not complain of such treatment, because he was a blockhead, but I did not feel disposed to allow myself to be put on a par with him.
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I long to see him treated as a prince, and making love to Madame Sagredo."
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The whole imposture would soon have been discovered if anyone had possessed a peerage, but it just happened that there was not a copy in Corfu, and the French consul, a fat blockhead, like many other consuls, knew nothing of family trees.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 6,018 ~ ~ ~
The only thing which struck me as disagreeable was that the young girls could not speak Italian, and I did not know Greek enough to enable me to make love to them.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 6,903 ~ ~ ~
It was written in the book of fate that I should return to Venice a simple ensign as when I left: the general did not keep his word, and the bastard son of a nobleman was promoted to the lieutenancy instead of myself.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 7,042 ~ ~ ~
Our chief, a noble Venetian belonging to the Balbi family, said to us, "It would be a good joke to carry off those three blockheads, and to keep the pretty woman in our possession."
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The man who had recognized me was a noted pimp whom I had thrashed some time before for having deceived me.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 8,291 ~ ~ ~
Soon afterwards he bought an estate with the title of count, became a Venetian nobleman, and his origin as a country bumpkin was forgotten.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 10,479 ~ ~ ~
I had never made love to her but once in a trifling sort of way, and in the presence of the old lady, but I was surprised not to see her after that for several days, and I expressed my astonishment.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 11,285 ~ ~ ~
I began to make love to her as a young man of no consequence, and at hours which I thought would not attract attention: but all hours belong by right to the established lover, and I therefore found myself sometimes with her when the Prince of Monaco called to see her.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 11,593 ~ ~ ~
One evening I was in the foyer of the Italian Comedy, where between the acts the highest noblemen were in the habit of coming, in order to converse and joke with the actresses who used to sit there waiting for their turn to appear on the stage, and I was seated near Camille, Coraline's sister, whom I amused by making love to her.
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the nasty hussies!" exclaims the mother.
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As he had not sufficient wit to amuse himself with the follies of other kings and with the absurdities of humankind, he kept four buffoons, who are called fools in Germany, although these degraded beings are generally more witty than their masters.
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Yet these professional buffoons sometimes captivate the mind of their master to such an extent that they obtain from him very important favours in behalf of the persons they protect, and the consequence is that they are often courted by the highest families.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 13,425 ~ ~ ~
Those who interested me among the satellites gravitating around that star were the Swede Gilenspetz, a Hamburger, the Englishman Mendez, who has already been mentioned, and three or four others to whore Croce called my attention.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 14,735 ~ ~ ~
He has told me that, if he had not seen it with his own eyes, he never would have believed that a man could run the race that you ran so splendidly the other night, but he says that, by making love in that manner, you bid defiance to death, for he is certain that the blood you lost comes from the brain.
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I pity you both, however, with all my heart, because I know that you are obliged to make love through a grating in that horrid parlour.
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'It might be so,' I said to her, 'but his name does not shew my lover to be the bastard of that nobleman, and still less his legitimate child, for M. de Bragadin was never married.'
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He no longer made use of his hiding-place, partly because we now only lay in the recess, and partly because, having had time to make love before my arrival, his desires were appeased.
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I kept my casino, which cost me little, and as I went to see M. M. twice a week I slept there on those occasions, and made love with my dashing Tonine.
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I should like to see the hussy."
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At this word Murray commanded her to be silent, calling her by the name of her honourable business; and the slut got up to take her cloak, saying she would go.
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Hereupon the slut took off her habit and her petticoat, and if we had allowed her she would have soon been in a state of nature, no doubt in the expectation of our passions granting what our reason refused.
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But when I said something about it to the hussy, she told me they were allowed to keep their hair under their caps, and I was weak enough to believe her."
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I saw the wretched man standing at the bar drinking chocolate and making love to the girl.
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In the morning, I bought an old overcoat, and hired an ass to journey on, and near Feltre I bought a pair of boots.
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He made love to all the servant girls, and as he had neither the figure nor the manners to please them, his attentions were returned with good hearty slaps, which he bore patiently, but was as outrageous as ever in the course of twenty-four hours.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 19,297 ~ ~ ~
Yesterday evening, a young fellow in the Inland Revenue who had been seduced to sup with us by a hussy of Genoa, after losing forty louis, threw, the cards in the face of my landlady and called her a thief.
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Esther impatiently called her a blockhead, and entreated me to let her ask another question.
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In the meanwhile I bore as well as I could the poor figure he must be cutting before the officers at table, who, after hearing the insolence of this young blockhead, might take me for a coward.
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The young blockhead seemed taken aback and in his turn bit his lips, but his evil genius made him, strike in again at dessert.
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I had scarcely finished what I had to say when Master Blockhead said, with a laugh, that he knew Lolotte to be a good sort of girl, as he had slept with her at Paris.
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"There is no such thing, and, even if there were, if the oracle is not your own brain you can always find out anything you want to know."
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I should have liked to make love to them, to make the best of my time before I became a monk.
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I look upon him as a mere buffoon."
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I was obliged to hide my game, so, although I disliked them intensely, I made love to them, hardly raising my eyes to glance at Madame, who looked ravishing.
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I shut the door, and made the little hussy witness of my ardour with my sweetheart.
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I have been assured, but can scarcely believe it, that he cured a consumptive patient of a secret disease by means of the milk of an ass, which he had submitted to thirty strong frictions of mercury by four sturdy porters.
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Seeing my neighbour's spirits rising, I proceeded to make love to her, and asked her if she were always as ready to defy those who paid their court to her.
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I left the doctor, and instead of going towards the inn, where the hussy Zeroli was doubtless waiting for me, I made my way towards the peasant's house, which already seemed to me the temple of the most blissful deities, determined to obtain the information I required as prudently as might be.
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The husband went out to order the dinner, and feeling myself authorized by the loss of twenty Louis, I told the hussy that if she would not give me a plain promise to make me happy that afternoon I should go away when I had had my dinner.
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He had to leave at midnight and began to make love to his fair neighbour forthwith, and teased her in a thousand ways; but she remained as dumb as a statue, while he did all the talking and laughing, not regarding it within the bounds of possibility that she might be laughing at him.
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With these words the impudent hussy proceeded to exhibit me, and I let her do what she liked.
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This young fellow took my fancy by his originality; he had probably assumed it to distinguish himself from the blockheads amongst whom he had hitherto lived, and now used it in perfect good faith with everybody.
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"You hussy!" screamed the mother, "you are bringing disgrace on me; get out of my house.
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"All the better," said I to her, laughing internally, as I thought of Soleure, for I saw that I should thus be obliged to make love to the girl to whom I had not spoken for the fortnight she had been with us.
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Sleep, we will make love together afterwards."
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I spent the rest of the day in making love to Redegonde, and Therese, who saw that I was pleased with the girl, advised me to declare myself, and promised that she would ask her to the house as often as I liked.
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I live with my mother, who is a good woman, but devout to the point of superstition; she will damn my soul in her efforts to save it.
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One of the guests, a fine-looking man, on hearing my name announced, said gaily,-- "If you bear my name, you must be one of my father's bastards."
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"True, it often makes love to cease."
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Evidently the little hussy had told her mistress the story, and the mistress had thought fit to take the maid's place.
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However, the archbishop owed his promotion to the fact that he was a bastard of the Duc d'Orleans, the French Regent.
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She had made Love a robber, and the hungry boy had consented, but afterwards, when he craved more substantial fare, she refused him, and ardour was succeeded by contempt.
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What I wanted was some young hussy whom I could teach the part, and I thought of the Corticelli.
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The little hussy, in the latter case, slept also alone in a room next to her mother's, through whose chamber one had to pass to get to the daughter's.
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and you don't know his name, you little hussy, don't you?
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As for the Corticelli, she soon passed from tears to laughter, and would have done it well, but if, as I feared, the canon was a blockhead, I should have been degrading myself.
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Nobody wishes to be considered a fool or a blockhead, but clever women are not appreciated; and if a girl is witty or well educated she endeavors to hide her lights, at least if she desires to be married."
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There was one thing, however, which annoyed me intolerably, namely, that in spite of my coolness towards her, the little hussy pretended to think that I had forgotten and forgiven everything.
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I went every day to the fair cousins and made love, but I was still at the same point; I hoped, but could get nothing tangible.
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She raved against me madly, and begged the mother-superior to send me away, as I had come there to damn her.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 38,889 ~ ~ ~
I watched the game carefully, and noting how little by little her familiarity increased, I felt sure that she would have to surrender at last, if not at Genoa, certainly on the journey, when we would be thrown constantly in each other's society with nobody to spy upon our actions, and with nothing else to do but to make love.
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"He made a mistake, for you are a blockhead."
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I sat by the bed, and fell to making love to her, and at last made as if I would kiss her, but she resisted, and we went on talking.
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Here you must continue living with Annette; besides, I have got your niece to make love to."
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I had scarcely uttered the words, when the kindly blockhead rose and cried enthusiastically,-- "Parbleu!
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I hastened to rejoin them, and my niece took my arm, laughing heartily to hear the officer making love to Marcoline, who did not understand a word he said.
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"Damn the marchioness!
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"The right of love, blockhead, and the right of luck, and the right of the strongest!
~ ~ ~ Sentence 39,730 ~ ~ ~
"Are you always obliged to have--a girl beside you when you make love to her?"
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I shall be called a bastard, and my income of twenty-four thousand francs will be lost to me.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 39,772 ~ ~ ~
"You will be my son, and I will never allow anyone to call you a bastard."
~ ~ ~ Sentence 40,212 ~ ~ ~
The oracle told her that she must go to Paris for her lying-in, and leave all her possessions to her son, who would not be a bastard, as Paralis promised that as soon as I got to London an English gentleman should be sent over to marry her.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 41,156 ~ ~ ~
"I assure you, blockhead.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 42,095 ~ ~ ~
"But, Sophie dear, your mother does wrong in making you a bastard when you are the legitimate daughter of the dancer Pompeati, who killed himself at Vienna."
~ ~ ~ Sentence 43,239 ~ ~ ~
"I once took a violent fancy for the little hussy," said he.
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Five or six days afterwards, I met the little hussy at Vauxhall in company with Goudar.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 43,654 ~ ~ ~
The impudent slut honoured me with a smile of disdain, and then beginning to dress herself she proceeded to indulge in impertinent repartees.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 43,802 ~ ~ ~
When the slut saw me she gave a shriek and unhorsed her gallant, whom I caned soundly until he escaped in the confusion consequent on the servants, mother, and aunts all rushing into the room.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 43,839 ~ ~ ~
The slut began by saying that her young mistress loved me, and had only deceived me in accordance with her mother's orders.
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"Yes, I came up a minute after you had gone and I stayed till the three old sluts made up their minds to go with the constable.
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They have got about twelve guineas out of me on false pretences; they are as cunning sluts as the Charpillon."
~ ~ ~ Sentence 45,240 ~ ~ ~
Redegonde, however, calmed her by telling her the story, and she believed, or pretended to believe, it was all chance; but she said,-- "That's all very well; but you can't deny, you little slut, that you have been sleeping with him."
~ ~ ~ Sentence 45,720 ~ ~ ~
The fortunate governor presented himself, and the monarch, after honouring him with the title of blockhead, proceeded to scold him roundly.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 46,306 ~ ~ ~
The next day I went to Bomback by myself, as I was sure of meeting young Russian officers, who would have annoyed me by making love to Zaira in their own language.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 47,979 ~ ~ ~
The little slut told me she was a Venetian, and this putting me at my ease I told her that the authorities would never suspect her of doing such a thing as she was too young.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 48,932 ~ ~ ~
With these words I made my way out of the hall, and on turning my head round I saw that the two elderly men were keeping the young blockhead back.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 50,583 ~ ~ ~
However, I did not conceal my bliss, and made love to her whenever the servant was out of the room.